STEP ONE: Ask God to help you forgive your dad for what he did or did not do for you. Imagine your dad standing before you asking you for your forgiveness: “Please fore give me for not protecting you and for not making you feel safe. Forgive me for not showing you respect for the unique way God gifted you. Please forgive me for not being the child I wanted, for not living up to my expectations, for not treating you with the love of a father. Will you forgive me for not keeping my promises to you, for not keeping my word, and having the integrity to speak to you with kindness? Forgive me for not telling you that I love you, and for abandoning you emotionally. Forgive me for my silence, and for not encouraging you. Forgive me for not being the example God intended as a father, for not teaching you to be responsible for your words and actions. Forgive me for showing favoritism to your siblings, or to my favorite sports team. Forgive me for my temper, for striking you and discipling you with rage. Forgive me for not providing for you financially or emotionally, for being selfish and manipulative. Forgive me for abusing you sexually, emotionally or intellectually. Forgive me for embarrassing you in front of others, for not teaching you about God, for not practicing unconditional love. Forgive me for expecting you to act like an adult and robbing you from a child’s playful life. Forgive me for conceiving you out of wedlock, or for not wanting you in my life, for rejecting you as my child. If I have hurt you in any other way, please tell me so that I can ask for your forgiveness. PART TWO: Dear heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus, I command all spirits of fear, rejection, deaf and dumb spirits to leave me now! With authority as a child of God, I cancel all Satan’s power and authority over me for the unforgiveness I held against my dad. PART THREE: Imagine your dad saying to you: I bless you my precious child. You are so loved, and especially made by God, unique and perfect. I am so proud of you. I honor you and I speak life to every cell in your body, mind and soul. You are the perfect gift from God, a beautiful child, a child that God delights in as do I. I bless you with the love of God Almighty and that your heart be full of His mercy and grace. I bless you with God’s very best, with His anointing, with His blessings that include joy, peace and wisdom. I bless you with the blessing of Ephraim and Manasseh, that you will forget the pain of your past and that your future will continue to unfold according to God’s plan. AMEN — Consider writing a memoir to your dad.

Praise be to God that He arranged that we be reconciled just 6 months before Earl took his final breath. My dad was born in Little Rock, Arkansas on September 10, 1926. He died of cancer in Coos Bay, Oregon at the age of 80. He had three children from his first wife Maria. My dad had a mind like the Rain Man. He was the Jimmy Stewart of Coos Bay as he financed homes to people that otherwise would not qualify for credit.  Earl was 6’4″ just like Wayne, but he looked like Dean with a drink in his hand. He enjoyed entertaining people and was the owner of a bar in Salida, California.  He was a generous man, and the best father he knew how to be.  I love my dad.  He had his flaws, but what dad has none? Our Father in heaven has given me the grace to truly forgive my dad and love him for who he was.

Bob Hope was born in 1903 in England, he was a father of four children. Mr. Hope quietly celebrated his 100th birthday in May of 2003, at his Taluca Lake home. He died of pneumonia on July 27, 2003. Hope donated his papers to the Library of Congress.  Was he a loved Dad?

John Wayne was born on in Iowa in 1907, he had seven children from two of his three wives.  Wayne received the nickname “Duke”  because he spent so much time with his dog named Duke. He died of cancer in 1979. In honor of his charitable work in the fight against cancer, Wayne’s children established the John Wayne Cancer Foundation in 1985.  Was John loved by his kids?

Ronald Reagan was born in 1911 in Illinois, he had four children born within two marriages.  As the 40th President of the USA, he was shot, recovered and ended the cold war, and watched the Berlin wall fall. In his inaugural speech in 1981, Reagan announced that “government is not the solution to our problems; government is the problem.” Was Ronald respected by his kids?

Dean Martin was born in 1917 in Ohio, he had eight children from three wives.  Dean quit school, shined shoes, worked pumping gas and as a boxer.  His idol was Bing Crosby. Dean died at the age of 78 of respiratory failure on Christmas day in 1995. Dean was an alcoholic, did his kids suffer?

Frank Sinatra was born in 1915 in New Jersey, he was the father of three children from his first wife. Frank sang and he also acted. With a show business career that spanned more than 50 years, Sinatra’s continued mass appeal can best be explained in the man’s own words: “When I sing, I believe. I’m honest.” He died at the age of 82. Was Frank a great dad?